Change simply doesn't happen when couples are stuck in a point-counterpoint debate. In fact, the deepest moments of intimacy are often wordless. This workshop will help you break the classic destructive cycle of female criticism and male withdrawal, using methods based on the latest research on gender differences to create powerful, healing moments of positive emotion and connection right in session. You'll learn how to help couples stop spinning themselves repeatedly into aroused but counterproductive neurophysiological states of male inadequacy and shame, and female fear-of-abandonment. You'll discover why the magic words "I was wrong" and expressions of vulnerability can trigger compassion and neurophysiological change in a partner. You'll learn about the positive mind-body changes that accompany expressions of accountability. By session's end, you'll have a new toolkit for teaching your clients how to experience delight in each other's company and resolve rather than rerun problems. (This session will continue with Workshop 527.)